Forever and Always Read online

  “That’s rich coming from you” she snapped back at him.

  “I am sorry I weirded out on you earlier” Sam replied. “Please just let me explain”.

  “I don’t want to hear it Sam” she said trying to pull her hands from his but he held her tightly. “I get it, I do. Last night was a mistake and its fine. I am a big girl. I’ll get over it”.

  “Jesus Mel” he replied, her words cutting through him. “How can you think that? Don’t you know what you mean to me?”

  “I thought I did” she whispered trying hard not to cry. “But I really don’t know what to feel. You were so distant and cold this morning. I just don’t know”.

  “Melanie I love you” he said pulling her into his arms and holding her close to him. “And it scares me how much. But I have done things in my past that I am not proud of. I am afraid if you know you won’t want me, But I was different then. Or I am different now”.

  Melanie just stared at him. She felt so confused. He took her hand and led her to some large rocks that were close by and they both sat down on them, still holding hands.

  “Ok so, tell me” Melanie said nervously, unsure she wanted to hear what he was going to say. He took a deep breath and let go of her hand. He couldn’t look at her while he told her.

  “Since I was younger I have always been popular with girls” He began shifting nervously on the rocks. “And I knew it. God I was such an asshole. I used girls like they meant nothing. I knew the right things to say to charm them until I got what I wanted then I would drop them like they were trash”.

  “So you were a player” Melanie said trying to sound unaffected but inside her stomach knotted tightly. She just couldn’t imagine Sam began the way he said he was. The Sam she knew was sweet, kind and caring.

  “I guess you could say that” he laughed nervously. “When I was in my senior year in high school I met this girl. Callie. She was sweet, innocent and kind. I guess she was kind of like you. There was this other guy at school and he loved her more than anything else in the world. And I knew it. He was perfect for her, they were perfect together. But I couldn’t leave them. I wanted what I couldn’t have and I charmed her and seduced her until I finally got what I wanted. It broke his heart and when I just finished with her, I just dropped her there like she just didn’t matter. He refused to take her back and she was heartbroken”.

  He stopped and stared out over the sea. Melanie wasn’t sure but she though she saw tears dancing in his eyes. She reached down and took his hand and squeezed it softly.

  “A few days later I arrived at school. Everyone was whispering” he continued. “Everyone was looking at me strangely. It was like you know that dream when you are at school and you are naked. And everyone is looking at you. Well I was living it except I wasn’t naked”.

  He took a deep breath and blew it out harshly. He closed his eyes and tried to steady his breathing.

  “Callie had been found dead that morning” Sam finally said unable to hold the tears back. “She had taken a load of pills and it was her Mom that had found her dead”.

  “Oh Sam” Melanie said as the tears trickle down her face. She pulled him to her as he sobbed softly.

  She held him close and wrapped her arms around him. Her heart was breaking for him. She wasn’t expecting this. He wrapped his arms tightly around her and held her close to him.

  “This morning when you said about me saying that to all the girls” he said finally as he began to calm down. “It just brought it back to me”.

  “Sam I was just kidding” Melanie assured him, pulling back from him a little so she could look him straight in the face. “If I had have known”.

  “I swear I would never hurt you Melanie” he said pulling her to him, his eyes locking with hers. They were filled with a mixture of both sadness and fear.

  “I believe you Sam” she replied and kissed him tenderly on the lips and hugged her again.

  They walked back up the beach hand in hand in silence at first. Melanie glanced at Sam nervously a couple of times. She wondered what he was thinking.

  “So what happen after, you know” Melanie asked as they walked back.

  “Well as you can imagine I wasn’t that popular anymore” he explained. “But that was fine. I really had no interest in that life anymore. I threw myself into school and worked hard. I got a fresh start when I went to collage but inside I couldn’t forget what had happened. It took me a long time to have the nerve to ask a girl out again”.

  “Oh” Melanie didn’t know why she felt a pang of jealousy. She tried to sound natural “So there were other girls”.

  “Just one” he replied quickly glancing at Melanie. “Carolyn”.

  “Oh” she replied her voice sounding smaller than she meant it to.

  “We dated for almost two years” he told her. “But obviously it didn’t work out. I found out she had been cheating on me. Pay back I guess for what happened Callie”.

  “Oh” why couldn’t she say something else? She had heard enough. They walked the rest of the way in silence.

  They spent the day together relaxing at the beach house, enjoying the sun. Melanie tried to seem normal but her head was buzzing with everything Sam had told her. She just couldn’t seem to get her head around the idea of Sam being the way he told her he used to be. He was sweet and kind and so thoughtful. She couldn’t ever imagine him being so cold and callous that he would hurt someone so badly.

  She also couldn’t get her head around the fact he had been in a long term relationship. She had only been with Mike and what they had was nothing in the end.

  Once again she spent the night in Sam’s arms and all the worries and concerns that had invaded her mind through the day suddenly seemed unimportant now. She loved Sam and he loved her and for now, that was all that mattered.

  But as she drifted off to sleep images of Sam with so many faceless girls filled her thoughts. She could see Sam laughing at the girls and them sobbing and begging him not to leave them. But he just moved on to the next one and then the next one. Suddenly the faceless girls weren’t faceless any more. They were her. She was crying and pleaded with Sam to love her and he just laughed and pushed her away.

  She woke with a jolt, her breathing was rapid and her cheeks were covered in tears. She looked over at Sam sleeping next to her and she relaxed. As she lay back down on her pillow he wrapped his arms around her once again and pulled her closer to him.

  “I love you Melanie” he sighed in his sleep and his words were enough to sooth her spirits and she snuggled up against him and drifted off into a more peaceful sleep.

  ********************

  The next two weeks passed by so quickly. Maggie would ring every day to check on her, as would her Mom. She had texted her Dad a couple of times but never spoke to him again. She decided she would wait till she got home to sort things out with him. Being so far away made it too hard.

  But Sam was a great support. He knew whenever she had contacted her Dad, because she would be upset and he would just sit quietly and hold her tightly. He always knew exactly how to cheer her up. But on her worst days they would go to their secret little beach and spend time together, just the two of the away from the rest of the world.

  On one such visit, they climbed the small hills that surround the beach and made love in the long grass.

  “I could stay here forever” Melanie said as they lay breathless side by side staring up and the crystal clear blue sky.

  “Why don’t you?” he asked suddenly as he leaned up on his elbow and stared down at Melanie.

  “Why don’t I stay?” she asked surprised and laughed. “Are you serious?”

  “Yes” he replied. “You could stay here with me. I have an apartment in New York. I would take care of you. It would be perfect”.

  “Sam as lovely as that sounds, I just can’t” Melanie replied sitting up and buttoning up her top. “I have to finished school. And there is my parents too. And I want to go to college. I want to be
a teacher”.

  “You could go to college here” he said sitting up next to her.

  “Sam how could I” Melanie asked. “My Dad would never agree to pay for me to stay here. He probably couldn’t afford it anyway”.

  “I told you I would take care of you” Sam exclaimed. “When I turned twenty one. I was given a very large trust fund. Money would not be an issue.”

  “It would be to me” Melanie sighed. “Sam I am very grateful, I honestly am but this is something I want to do for myself. I don’t want someone to take care of me. I would never be happy knowing I had to depend on someone for hand outs. And I know that’s not how you would see it but I would. You are very sweet to even offer and there is nothing I would love more then to stay here forever with you. But I need to do it in my own way. I am sorry”.

  “You have nothing to be sorry for” Sam said and smiled. “In fact if it’s possible I think I love you more. Most girls I know look at me and see dollar signs. They go through life just waiting to land a rich husband and to them that would mean they were successful. But you are different. You have hopes and dreams that go way beyond the flashy and sparkly things in life. You know who you are and what you want. You are so strong and determined. You are perfect”.

  “Sometimes I don’t feel so strong” Melanie replied and looked down at her hands.

  “You are probably the strongest person I know” he replied and took her hand. “We will figure this out Melanie. Whatever it takes. I don’t ever want to let you go. I love you”.

  He kissed her and they sunk back down on to the sand.

  Later that evening when they headed home, Sam said he wanted to cook her his world famous Lasagne. Melanie asked what made it world famous to which Sam replied “Because it is baby”. Melanie tried her hardest not to laugh but his face was so serious she couldn’t help it. Then Sam pretended to be deeply wounded and Melanie laughed even harder.

  She watched him as he moved comfortably around the kitchen.

  “So where did you learn to cook” Melanie asked as he placed the minced beef into a pan and placed it on the hob on the cooker. “I would burn boiling water”.

  “Well when I was a kid” he explained as turned to the counter and began to finely chop some garlic. “Alice, our house keeper was an amazing cook. Mom used to work long hours at the hospital and Dad would be away on business more than he was home.

  Andrew was a typical teenager out all the time with his friends or a girl, so I used to be left at home with Alice quite a bit. I would sit on the counter and watch her for hours preparing meal.

  When Mom was home she would always tell me to go to my room and not to be getting under Alice’s feet but when it was just the two of us I would sit there and watch everything she did. Then one day she asked if I would like to try myself. She taught me everything. And I loved every minute of it. Then one day, when I was about eleven I was cooking and I stretched over to get something, I don’t even remember what. My sleeve caught the handle of a pot of boiling water and I knocked it down on myself and scaled my leg”.

  “Oh My God” Melanie exclaimed.

  “Oh it wasn’t a bad burn” he shrugged. “Just a minor thing really. But my Mom freaked out. She sacked Alice. I tried to lie and said I had waited till Alice was gone and climbed up to get something even though she had told me not to go near the stove. But my Mom didn’t care. I was devastated the day Alice packed her belongings and left. She had been more of a parent to me the either of mine had ever been”.

  “That is so sad” Melanie replied.

  “Don’t get me wrong Melanie” he said putting down the knife and looking up at her. “I love my Mom and Dad very much. They were good parents really. It’s just I would have given anything to have a Mom like some of my friends. You know Mom’s that were there every day when you came home from school. I didn’t really like the new housekeeper, but in all fairness I was never going to like anyone who was replacing Alice. So I just lashed out constantly and I turned into a nightmare when I was a teenager although you already know some of that”.

  Melanie just nodded knowing to what he was referring to.

  “That’s why when I have kids I want to be one of those parents who does everything with their kids. You know coach their little league team or their soccer team. I want my kids to feel like they are the most important thing in the world to me because they will be. Well them; and of course my wife”.

  “I have no doubt you will be a great Dad Sam” Melanie replied and she couldn’t help but think of Alex. He was a great dad too. He was always there for her and Sarah. She knew how much he loved her. Well she thought she knew.

  “Would you like me to teach you how to make my world famous Lasagne?” he asked raising his eyebrows as he asked the question.

  “Yes” she replied and jumped down of the kitchen stool she was sitting on and quickly moved around the kitchen island. “I would like that very much”.

  He patiently took her through every step as she nervously followed his instructions. And she began to relax and enjoy herself. Who knew cooking could be so much fun. They sat and drank wine as they waited for the lasagne to cook. Melanie only sipped hers, she had never really drank before she had started hanging out with Sam, not that they drank a great deal but it was still something she was getting used to.

  “You know my Dad isn’t such a bad guy” Melanie said suddenly even surprising herself as she had no idea where it came from. She thought that maybe the wine was going to her head a little.

  “I am sure he is a really nice guy” Sam replied and nodded.

  “He used to be like my best friend” Melanie continued sadly. “I was like the stereo typical Daddy girl. My Dad was my hero. I know that most girls think that about their Dad’s but he really was. I think that’s why I was so hurt by what happened”.

  “I can understand that” Sam replied and sipped his wine.

  “He was the one person I thought would never hurt me” she sighed. “I trusted him unconditionally and he took my deepest fear and crushed me with it. And he has no idea what he has done”.

  “I honestly believe he never meant to hurt you Melanie” Sam replied. “It is very obvious to me just how much he loves you. It has been weeks and he hasn’t stopped trying for even one day to make things right between you both. And it has to be hard for him so far away from you. But you asked him for time and he is giving you that. I really think you should forgive him”.

  “That’s the problem Sam” she said and took a deep breath. “I already forgave him...I just can’t forget. What does that say about me?”

  Before he could answer the timer beeped to say their lasagne was ready. Sam carefully removed it from the oven and placed it down on the wooden chopping board. He pulled out two plates and served two large slices of the lasagne and then placed the salad he had made next to it. They both picked up their plates and the wine and walked into the living room. They both sat down on the big rug and tucked into their dinner.

  “Wow” Melanie exclaimed. “This is really good. Definitely world famous and possible world class”.

  “I am a man of many hidden talents Melanie O’Leary” Sam replied with a mischievous grin. “And this is just the beginning”.

  ********************

  Maggie called on a Friday afternoon to say Mark was being released from hospital and he would be coming to stay with them at the beach house the next day. Mark woke up two days after the accident. He had a broken arm but other than the bump on the head, his injuries seemed more minor then was first thought.

  Melanie was delighted Mark was coming back with Maggie. She always loved Mark and she thought he was perfect for Maggie. She hoped him coming to the beach house with Maggie meant they maybe they had sorted things out finally.

  But she was sad too because it meant tonight would be the last night she would get to spend the whole night with Sam. She was surprised how quickly she had become so accustom to waking up to him every morning.

 
; Sam helped her to give the beach house a good cleaning, not that it was that dirty but she wanted to make sure it looked nice for Maggie and Mark when they returned.

  At seven Sam headed into town to get some dinner for them both. Haven’t spent all day cleaning Melanie was so not in the mood to cook.

  While Sam was gone, Melanie ran a bath and picked out something nice to wear that evening. She wanted it to be special. She picked her favourite cream Lipsy dress. It was a knee length goddess type dress. With two little sequined straps and a slight gap at the bust. She picked her nude coloured dolly shoes to go with it. She laid the dress on the bed and quickly pulled her hair into a pony on the top of her head so it wouldn’t get wet, then stripped and climbed into the bath.

  She was soaking in the bath about twenty minutes when she heard her phone beep telling her she had a text message. She quickly climbed out of the bath wrapping a towel around her and went to check her phone.

  It was from Sam

  “Can u come over 2 my house, need 2 show you something”

  Melanie smiled and quickly typed back her response.

  “Be there in ten minutes x”

  Melanie quickly dried herself and pulled on her matching white lace underwear. Quickly she slipped her dress over her head and pulled the zip at the side up. She released her hair from its bobbin and ran a brush threw it. She decided to leave it down tonight. She slipped on her shoes and went to the full length mirror to check her reflection. All she needed to do was apply some lips gloss and a little perfume and she was ready.

  Chapter 9When Melanie reached Sam’s place the door it was already open. She tapped on it lightly before she pushed it open and stepped inside.

  When she walked into the room her heart almost stopped. Sam was standing in the middle of the room wearing a black linen shirt and black trousers and looking heart stoppingly gorgeous. Around him he was surrounded by what looked like hundreds of tiny twinkling candles. There was soft music playing on the stereo and behind him the table was set for a candle lit dinner.